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Finale Part 3
Subtitle: A final penguin twist - and a fight
Mission:  Find The Oriole!!
By Sebastian Dash

Original Finale

As you'll see, it isn't actually concluded here, although we DO have a clear winner.. as you'll hopefully be able to tell yourself.

Although I'm credited for writing most of this, Catrina was a big help with the dialogue for our side.

Even more fighting here as the battle builds to a fever pitch! Will KOKOL get any closer to finding the Toot Oriole, though? And will His surprise for Catrina show up? You'll just have to keep reading to find out!

Reminder: I had help from Catrina on this one.


Two on three.

Sebastian Dash would have thought that'd be more than enough odds stacked in their favor for this fight.

They'd only cleared the scene of the previous battle five minutes or so earlier. The Penguin Quartet had sworn they knew a faster way up, which only a Penguin could make the most of. They'd sworn a promise to meet the others at the top of the hill. Catrina Whiteclaw ignored them. Feena smiled and seemed to sincerely be looking forward to their return. Fluffy was sleeping. Raw Hide sneered, figuring they were probably lying, and Dash secretly hoped they were lying. Thus, the KOKOL quintet continued, relatively unabated up the mountain, making their unfaltering march onwards and upwards.

Catrina looked Feena over. Despite putting all of her energy into an ultra powerful, battle decisive blow, Feena was already back on her feet, and insisting she go with them. "Feena," Catrina checked Feena over. "Hon, how are you? That was a hell of a move back there."

"Thanks." Feena propped herself up against a passing tree as she cuddled a sleeping Fluffy Hamster in her arms. "I'll be fine. .. As long as Fluffy's awake if I need defending."

Feena giggled. Fluffy, hearing his name stirred from his slumber with a "Wha?", looked around, and promptly decided to catch a little more sleep.

"Lazy hamster," Dash muttered under his breath.

"Dash, be nice!" Catrina admonished, before turning back to Feena, leaving Dash to mentally curse that feline hearing of hers. Catrina continued. "Feena, I want you to stay here with Fluffy."

"Thank you for your concern," Feena answered with a polite bow. "But that isn't necessary. I need to help ensure we finish the mission successfully."

"I don't want you putting yourself at risk, if you're not a hundred percent," Catrina insisted. "Understand?"

"I'll be fine!" Feena insisted.

"I'll keep an eye on her," Dash volunteered.

"Sure you won't run off again?" Catrina snapped.

"Will you let it GO?" Dash growled. "This isn't the time to dwell on that."

"I wish you'd ALL shut UP and get MOVING!" Raw Hide complained. Loudly. "I gotta get some more senseless violence." He paused, thinking over his desires. "No.. wait.. What I really want is to save the Tool Oral. You know.. The bird."

"The Toot?" Feena asked. Feena found something about the brute unlikable, but chose to represent the FSM faith with a measured amount of respect and dignity.

"Yeah, that." Raw Hide briefly considered a joke about how if he used a martial arts move on the Toot, he'd be flipping the bird. However, he decided against it, due to his brand new sophisticated, noble image. So instead, he just did his best to scowl in a noble fashion. This new moral code wasn't hard to figure out, at all! "I think the big thing is - "

Catrina and Dash both shh'ed him. Catrina added in an elbow for good measure.

"What was THAT for?!" Raw Hide complained. Loudly.

"Someone's coming," Dash explained, keeping his voice fairly lower.

"Oh. Kill?" Raw wondered.

"If need be," Catrina explained. "But let's see if we can't get the jump on them first, hun." Catrina paused to sniff at the air. "Correction: It'll be up to you and Dash to get the jump on them. I've got some personal business to tend to, and I want you," Catrina turned to point to Feena, "to stay on the sidelines with Fluffy."

Feena started to protest, then nodded instead.

"What do you mean, 'personal business?'" Dash protested.

"I don't have time to argue," Catrina responded. What surprised Dash most wasn't the response, but the quiet, serious, almost reflective voice it was delivered in. "You've got to have faith in me, and I need to trust you to keep Feena safe. . . . and finish the mission."

Emotions and recent events swum together in Dash's mind. He knew he should protest. He knew she was going to be putting her life at risk. But at that moment, all Dash wanted was to regain her trust again. . .

He nodded. "Keep safe, kitten."

She smiled slightly, with a nod just as subtle. "I'll do my best. One of the greatest hunters in the Kingdom, you know?"

Dash smiled and closed his eyes for a second. "Go get 'em, Catrina." For a split second, all the mistakes and insidious plots were put out of mind. Raw Hide's voice interrupted Dash's perfect little moment, bringing reality crashing through his daydream with it. When he opened his eyes, the others were starring at him, and Catrina was gone.

"They're getting close!" Feena warned.

Dash nodded, pulling his broadsword Bad Beats to ready . . .


The fight started without much prelude. Dash managed to get the drop on Grillhamo, founding member of the elite seven, Before his two elite troops could get into the fight, Raw Hide rushed out from the darkness of the evening mountain path, rushing them both with a berserker fury. The battle was immediately intense.

Dash was still suffering from the previous encounter, having slammed his body on a tree dozens of feet above the air, nearly falling to his doom. Indeed, if not for Catrina's amazing leaping ability, which allowed her to catch Dash midfall, he might not have survived.

Raw Hide screamed with fury, having a desperate urge for revenge in Grillhamo, yet finding himself occupied with his two Knob Goblin underlings. Before, the Goblins had proven to hardly be worth the time it took for Raw Hide to kill - or for them to kill themselves trying to fight. These two were not only highly competent, they were working flawlessly as a team. Raw Hide would overpower one, only to have the other attack him, leaving both free to scurry from his grasp. Like fighting a couple rats in the tavern.

Knowing the danger of the Goblin leader made Dash fight defensively. He wasn't sure if that was the best move or not- Grillhamo simply kept pouring the high pressure attacks on Dash. Dash didn't know the black panther was named Ebonia, and probably wouldn't have cared. He could speak to the tremendous danger of the panther, however.

Dash was no slouch in the agility department himself. As the panther approached, Dash took a running start, jumping off the panther's head and catching the rider with a perfectly executed kick to the midsection. Dash bounced off the mighty Goblin's mighty chest, rolling to the side. The impact was enough to dismount the rider as well.

"Who ARE You nobodies?" Raw Hide cried out at his enemies.

"I am Gwenchlan The Vaguely Cute! Him's Roxcrak the Brutalian!" she explained! She somersault underneath his bladed. "We hate you long time!"

"Yup, we gonna hurt you, busta!" he added, as he added his foot to Raw Hide's spine in the form of a kick to the back. Meanwhile, Dash rushed at the leader, Grillhamo, who casually turned his back as Ebonia, the ebony cat threw himself on Dash, pinning Dash down. Dash wedged his broadsword between the monster's jaws, using it to fight the feline off. Dash sure was attracting a lot of aggression from felines lately.

Raw Hide sighed as he parried off an attack from both opponents at once, beginning to wonder if this might not be tougher Knob Goblins than he'd faced last time. . .


Catrina Whiteclaw could smell the death as she got near the top of the mountain. As a lifelong hunter, of course, she'd become used to death. During her time in the fighting pits and beyond, she'd even become used to the idea of Sentient deaths. It didn't mean she liked it or took it lightly.

Death was to be expected on a mission of this level of danger. Didn't make it any easier.

Catrina found the source of the death scent. Two adventurers, possibly on their way through their own right of trial. Their throats were missing. "Nothing more than innocent noobs," Catrina noted.

They'd been mauled, on top of it. Catrina looked for something to cover them with, ultimatly settling on leaves. She said a quick prayer to the goddess above for their souls, that she should be moved to watch over them in their next life, and grant them the reprise from their agonizing end. Should she be moved, let her grant them the fulfillment they would never be given in this world.

There was precious little time to act. The top of the mountain was very close, and Catrina could detect the slightest hint of a bird in the air. Normally, that would mean a potential dinner. In this case, though, eating this bird might not be such a good idea.

She followed the scent of the Toot Oriole hardly a minute before recognizing the other scents. There'd been a battle here recently. Even more recently than the mauling!

Catrina's head threatened to spin. Yeti attack? *sniff* No, definitely no sign of anything resembling a yeti. A dozen paces up found a unconscious Knob Goblin. . .. . no. . . . dead. From the looks of it, something caved his skull in. Thick strands of noodles which were obviously delicious at one point stuck tightly to the Knob Goblin's neck, with a discarded pasta scroll, burned out, laying in the distance.

The battlefield showed signs of a fight hardly a mere ten minutes before, Catrina summoned. Discarded penguin weapons spoke to the fact the Knob Goblins fought valiantly.

She strained her ears, but heard nothing of a sign of battle. She kept sniffing, focusing her energies into detecting something she could use. Some sign of . . . She suddenly got a scent! Feline, too. First instinct said to go after it and spill enough of his blood to flood Seaside Town. Intuition also prevented her from rushing in blind. Something else was amiss here, to say nothing of the fact his scent seemed . . . odd. Almost as if there were two scents. . .

That's when she saw the cage, and everything fit together. She covered the dozen and a half feet space, finding it smashed against a tree, with a broken, discarded knob goblin kneecapping stick to the outside, besides an iron pasta spoon, bent in half, and obviously well past any condition to be used for anything other than, maybe, a spoon boomarang. Catrina had to get some kind of message to Dash, to let him know her theory- the Penguin Mafia might not be in possession of the Toot.

Although it was also possible the Knob Goblins had managed to keep a hold on - what was that?

Catrina's sense of smell flared up, as her hair stood on end. Her head snapped back as she saw a shadowy figure moving south. . . .

Catrina rushed full speed, realizing it wasn't His style to play with her. . . Whoever it was, they were in for a fight. . .

Catrina pushed aside her revelation on the capturing of the Toot Oriole, even as the battle raged full force to the south . . .

To be concluded in Mission #4: Save That Toot!


 
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Kingdom of Loathing (KOL) is a (mostly) original online game that apparently has something to do with Asymmetric Publications, LLC, and something called a Jick, who probably copyrighted and trademarked the thing up the wahoozer. Wahoozer is a word I just made up. If you don't like it, bite me. And if you refuse to bite me go to . . . ANYWAY, this is the archive for an interactive writing game based on KOL, and a specific clan within- the Kingdom of KOL. Specific characters belong to their specific owners, specifically, unless specifically stated otherwise. This game was developed by Joshua A. Dexter, with rules based in part on Mercenary and Equinox. This is a non profit game done for entertainment purposes only. If a rash develops on your imagination, desist use immediately and consult a physician, psychologist, or 1-900 psychic for further assistance. KOL forums, store, entry at Answers, KOL's entry at Archive.org, and it's entry at Wikipedia, and KOL's own wiki. - JAD
In other words, I don't own KOL, or KOKOL, and KOL doesn't own KOL. Get it? Good!
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