Roleplay number SEVENTEEN in the mission! Just the thought makes me smile!
Anyway... It's been an especially long but fun ride this mission.. Vixen's first (mostly) solo.. Riko debut.. Samus did his first roleplay.. two of 'em in fact. Catrina enlisted the help of Him (now known as Daisuke!!) and her estranged brother Cattaras.. oh and snow bunnies!

This's a shorter piece than what you'd normally get out of Dash- even solo Dash.. due mostly to the deadline.. heh.. I think it's still a good way to end things- it sets Dash himself up for his participation in the finale.. sorta...
kinda
 

Everything's on the line, and Dash is desperate to find that orb, like his teammates and even a couple of his usual enemies are.. unfortunatly for Dash, he's run into a roadblock of demons!

(I'm really sorry if that metaphor didn't make any sense.)

Isle 9,001 at the local Seven- Eternal, somewhere in Hey Daze

  Dash sighed as the orges- literal orges he assumed, although he couldn't see them- dragged him down the Neverending Isle of Candy. Dash had no time to contemplate if it would live up to the name - or figure how he knew it- before they tossed him against a wall.

Dash got a good look at them for the first time. Security badges.. budging, stained muscle shirts.

"Breakin into a women's restroom huh?" One of the guards snarled at Dash.

Dash sighed, measuring the two up for the inevitable scuffle. "I think we both know that was an obvious distraction for my friend, Vixen. Whom I really must get back to, so if you'll pardon me. . ."

Dash put his speed into trying to sidestep the two, so he could make a break for it. No good. Wide as walls, they were, with another, slightly smaller (although still monstrously huge) bespectacled 'manager' looking type behind the two for effect.

"Maybe it was a trap," the oversized orge to Dash's left commented, nonchalantly catching Dash by the arm and hurling him hard against the wall. "Maybe we are, too."

Looking past them, Dash could swear the store itself was growing longer and larger, putting more distance between him and Vixen with every crucial second.

Although the larger two seemed grumpier than a college orc on finals day, the manager himself had a large, nearly grotesque smile and a personality that radiated happiness.

Evil, disgusting happiness.

"As you can see, you've just joined Hey Daze's fastest growing chain ever.. Literally!" The evil, disgusting grotesquely happy manager demon let out an equally horrible belly laugh. "All kidding aside, we're pressing you into service for our fine operation."

"What's wrong?" Dash asked, keeping that unshakable Rogue like defiant streak. "Twinkle toes here keep scaring away the customers?"

Eh, no point in showing fear, regardless of the fact they looked like they probably crushed boulders bigger than Dash in their time. (Wait.. irregardless? Unregardless? Dash wasn't sure... ) The two stared coldly at him, likely unable to believe he'd provoke fate.

Good.. Dash measured every reaction, subtle or otherwise, coldly looking for any opportunity to end this situation in any fashion. The throbbing pain in his arm told him to take the two very seriously, however.

"Listen, CHUMP!" the manager called out in a still eerily pleasant voice. "Er, no offense. But you're NEW to Hey Daze, and you walked into our store. Did you really think you'd just be walking around Hey Daze, going, 'Ohhh look at me, I don't need a job because I don't need to eat or sleep!' and we'd just go, "Oohh, look at you, you don't need a job so you can go do anything you want!" Like this is some kinda .. well, you know, that OTHER place?"

"I can honestly say that thought never crossed my mind," Dash answered. "Mainly because I have no idea what the Boris you just said."

The manager gave Dash a deadpan glare. "Nevertheless, you ARE working for us now.. until.. I don't know.. time ends, or possibly a couple hours past. How's that sound?"

"Sounds like fighting words," Dash answered, pulling his broadsword to a battle ready position in half the blink of a third of an eye.

One of the guards simply blinked, and the broadsword appeared in his hands, which engulfed the hilt of the sword effortlessly. Dash sighed. Well, that wasn't what I had planned at all,

"I bet that isn't what you had planned at-" the manager type started. "Oh, screw it, I hate that joke, too. Anywoo, you should probably put your outfit on and get to work."

He seemed pretty animated for a guy with black, dead, possibly rotting eyes.

"I don't belong here," Dash answered in an annoyed voice. "I'm not dead."

"Yeah, yeah, yea, get that one ALL the time," the manager answered. "Do I LOOK like I care, either way? I mean, assuming I believe you, which believe you me, is assuming an awful lot! Now, get that outfit on!"

Dash furrowed his brow.. then suddenly noticed the outfit WAS on. Dash eyeroll'ed at the gaudy outfit.

"Ahhh, MUCH better! I KNEW you'd see it MY way!" the manager coo'ed. "Now we need to find a skillset for you. DO you have *any* talents, small ugly human?"

UGLY?! Dash's moxious rage boiled, but he kept the proverbial poker face. "I'm good at security."

"Too risky for someone so frail looking," the manager type responded dismissively.

Dash measured his words carefully. "True. On the other hand, they might assume from my non threatening appearance that I'm not a threat. I'm sure I could prove I am."

The guards looked at each other and one grunted, "Mebbe."

The thug with the sword ran his finger along the edge then winced. "Ouch. Pig sticker got a bit magic bit in it."

Dash hid his confusion and simply nodded. "That too."

"I think I'll put you to work stocking things," the manager declared. "Get to work, stockboy!"

"Stocking.. what?" Dash looked around, suddenly realizing he was surrounded by several boxes marked, "Stock me, n00b." Spelling and all. "Oh. Okay."

Dash took a couple boxes, examined, and decided, "Hm.. I need my sword to get these open, and you better go look into those voyeurs on the other side of the store, reading magazines with no intention to purchase, and spreading messages of 'hope,' 'love,' 'joy,' and Jarlsberg."

"Good idea!" the manager type insisted. "Give him his sword so we can go track down those.. FILTHY HIPPIES! Oh, they make me SO MAD!"

The two guards looked at each other, decided they didn't actually get paid enough to point out how stupid the entire conversation was, and one nodded at the other, who immediately tossed Dash his sword. Dash looked busy for all of forty seconds, before whispering, "Dumb@ss," and wondering off the other way. His best bet would be to escape from the "inconvenience store" and hope Vixen could meet him outside.

It was about then Dash heard the public announcement about Hey Daze suddenly going to a pg-13 zone, by the way.

Ahwell, he wouldn't need to cuss to get out of *this* part of hell, nor would it need to be described. . . .

End.

( Well, Dash has.. er.. cunningly escaped. Look.. I'm the voice here and if I say it's cunning, it's cunning!
(*ahem - time to bring everything together in the mission finale!! )