Damn it!
I HATE Goblins!
The sudden attack threw Guac a bit off his guard, but like any trained warrior, he had his sword in hand and leaped into the fray.
The first 30 seconds were pure chaos. Bodies, swords, and other miscellaneous weapons soared through the air, each in their own degree of attack and defense.
Guac felt uncomfortable. He honestly didn’t know whose side he was on. He had only just met those KOKOL blokes, and had no idea whether or not to trust them.
But, hey, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.
Or at least so they say.
In the next fifteen or so seconds, the fight broke up into multiple, smaller quarrels.
And, just his luck, Guac found himself one-on-one against one of the Largest, meanest Guards.
Guac was alarmed to find himself on the defensive, backing up to avoid the guard’s huge swings of his sword.
For a whole minute, Guac attacked and parried in a horrid, macabre dance of death with the burly guard. Then he saw him. The Jester King of beasts. Smiling, Guac turned away from the guards, and began to push through the fight towards him.
Time: Two minutes after the fight began.
Shoving his way through the hordes, Guac finally reached the Jester.
“’Ello, there, Gov’na!”
The Jester looked over. He smiled, a cat playing with the mouse it is about to entrap and devour.
“It’s been a while, Guac.” Smiled the jester in his singsong voice.
“Jessie, Jessie Jester, Sir Kingly Jester, of beasts, the King!” Guac all but sang out in a taunt
The Jester’s eyes sparkled in delight, having fun with this game. He playfully began to swing his sword, which Guac easily dodged.
“Where’s you’re friend?” asked the Jester, referring to a time long, long ago. (But not to far away, oddly enough.)
“I don’t need him for a task so easy,” said the Guacanator with a smile, “I will flay you limb to limb, friend.”
The Jester King’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Guac. His voice deepened to a growl.
“If I recall, you couldn’t take me last time alone.”
“And if I recall, you were the one who ended up in a limp heap on the ground.” Guac said, his voice equally deadly.
“Ha! I have never heard such a false claim in the entirety of my existance!”
“Pride comes before the fall.”
“I was about to say that myself.”
“Touché.”
“Then may the best man win!” The King Declared.
A wry half-smile lit Guac’s face, as he confidently said:
“Your move.”
Time: 2minutes, forty-five seconds after the fight began.
It was a terrifying dance, both fear- and awe-inspiring at once. Imperceptibly fast, there was a cacophonous ringing of clashing steel, gunshots. Roaring beasts, whooshing magic.
Guac held his one-and-a-half hand sword, swinging, stabbing, and slashing in a lightning fast tango, while the Jester attacked with his massive two-handed sword in a terrifying square dance.
Guacanator attacked with a short, quick cut, but it was blocked by the Jester, who counterattacked with a wide swing at Guac’s head. Guac bent away from the attack, and parried it, following up with a stab at the Jester’s torso.
But alas, the sword went right through the now incorporeal body of the Jester. This did not through the Guacanator off a single beat; Guac withdrew his sword, which bounced off of the Jester’s sword after an attempt to behead the once again corporeal King. The Jester King did not dare to remain out of phase for more than a few seconds, as it exhausted him quickly, and in a fight as intense as this one, stamina was a dearly precious commodity.
The Jester King summoned his powers, and a wolf jumped off of a nearby roof, it’s fangs bared, running towards Guacanator One thing on its primeval mind: kill. It jumped at him.
Guac raised his sword and impaled the beast, but this left him open to an attack from the Jester’s mighty sword. Guac sidestepped in the nick of time, but put himself off balance.
Guac Set of a stream of sauce at the Jester King, who deflected it with a flick of his wrist. However, Occupied, by the magical assault, the Jester was open for a precious Fraction of a second.
Taking advantage of this, Guac turned his imbalance into a powerful roundhouse kick.
Guac missed his chance.
The Jester King of Beasts just barely managed to get his sword up in time to block Guac’s kick with the hilt.
The hit on his foot caused Guac to stumble backwards. Guac bit back tears and tried to avoid putting weight on his injured foot. He hoped to Jick it wasn’t broken.
Now out of sword range, Guac drew his happiness with his left hand, balanced precariously on one foot.
Taking aim, Guac opened fire. The Jester King dodged the bullets easily, his limber limbs and lightning fast reaction time allowing him to bend and contort out of the oncoming paths of bullets.
Seeing he was going nowhere, Guac threw his sword at the Jester King. Unsurprisingly, the Jester King dodged the sword. More surprisingly, however, he reached out the sword and actually snatched it out of the air. Great.
With his now free right hand, Guac drew his second happiness and doubled the fire, and to meet this, the Jester King doubled his efforts towards dodging. Now where he couldn’t just bend out of the way, The King went out of phase, the bullets passing through his shimmering, translucent body.
Gritting his teeth, Guac flicked a switch on both guns simultaneously. (Which believe me, is no easy feat at all.) A horrible, metal-on-metal chalk-on-blackboard squeal came from the pistols, and black smoke billowed out of them. Suddenly, bullets flew out at an unprecedented rate.
Yet still, The Jester King of Beasts dodged the onslaught of bullets.
Finally, with a loud clank, and clouds of acrid smoke, the guns fired their last, the final bullet speeding from the barrel, hurtling towards the Jester King. A cold panic went over the King, realizing that he could not dodge the bullet fast enough, and that he was too tired to incorporialize.
But the Jester wasn’t afraid.
At his bidding, a nearby bobcat jumped right in the path of the bullet, saving the Jester King’s life by way of living shield. Both Guac and the Jester watched the poor cat plummet through the air and collapse on the ground.
Their usefulness expended, Guac threw his happinesses (happinessi?) at the Jester King, who, exhausted, did not bother to dodge. They left two long, searing burns on the King’s face, their muzzles red with heat.
And then, there was peace.
To Be Continued...
An exciting bit of action and it's always cool seeing someone do a new take on one of the Elite 7, who were designed to be the big enemies of the Knob Goblins. The spacing, timing of the thing, and timestamp approach made it a unique piece.
Next up, we'll visit Sebastian Dash's prelude to the first ever Live RP!
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