First I keep up Inu's 4th wall breaking antics, then I slam her for it.

Yes.. this one was fun to write.

Most of it is just character interactions so I ended up jamming way too much action into the next part.. Alas, it made quite the well written Finale, I think, humility aside. Then again, I was waiting on the 'other' Finale to get posted, and I ended up having to help with it, anyway.

So that's one of the reasons we stopped doing two subquest Finales for a while. This is also my first 'real' stab at using Shamus, whom I didn't get to use much during the last mission due to his nature. (I don't count the parts where I use him before his first roleplay since I had only his fairly outdated bio to work off of, there.) I'd hoped to get more adventurers than three to work with, so that was a disappointment, as well. However, the roleplays and the action in part II are a highlight!

Geez, you'd think the opportunity for bonerdargon armor would attract a bigger crowd.

Maybe the rest of the clan is busy looking for paintbrushes or hanging lampshades.

The crypt hummed with an unnatural rhythm. In accordance with Samus's established description of the massive crypt, vines hung from the top of the doors, spiders crawled on the floors, and a strange scent of pine filled the room like censorship filling out a children's tv program.

Our exciting bonerdargon story opens with Shamus napping in the crypt, which is, if you think about it, really, really weird, don't you think? And if you're on the fence, let me assure you here- it is weird.

While his mojo points were filling up, Inuyaustin took off for a soda. Carbonated refreshness in a can. We're not exactly sure where she's getting them at, but maybe it's like the faraway land "The 80's" where soda machines are everywhere.

Poor Shamus. Always getting beat up, or having his leg broke, or grabbing the wrong end of a sword in the dark, or being kicked. Kicked very often, actually. In fact, him accidentally being kicked is how this story opens.

"Oww! Inu, knock it off, I'm trying to catch 40 z's here, and I'm only up to 28 or so!"

"Sorry! Didn't see you there.. not much light in this place.." started an unfamiliar voice when Shamus opened his eyes as he sat up, realizing it wasn't Inu that had kicked him. Rather, it was an unfamiliar figure. Nearly tripped over him, he gathered. Looked human, although in the dimly lit crypt, it also looked vaguely. . . furry. Shamus blinked his eyes repeatedly, trying to foce his vision to clear up. Weird.. it didn't look human. It kinda did but it also looked like a bunny, which didn't sound dangerous, but... well, Shamus remembered the Noob Cave disasters.

Shamus suddenly jumped to his feet, sword drawn in defense! Whoever it was, she'd get a nice piece of his sword and . . . Shamus blinked, seeing the confused look in her eyes. Her body was different, alright. she sorta looked like a bunny in pirate's... something about her looked familiar.. naw, couldn't be! "Stand back, monster!"

She looked around, confused. "What 'monster,' Shamus? I've cleared the area of the skeltons, at least for now."

Shamus dropped his sword down to his side. "Wait, how do you know my name?"

She looked even more confused than a second ago. And annoyed, if not a bit angry. "You FORGOT me?"

He squinted. "Inu? What kind of form is.."

"No, NOT your familiar!" she snapped at him, starting to become a bit annoyed. "We met.. well.. we were both present for, the fiasco at the end of our journey to Hey Daze. We were surprised to hear you made it out."

"Still kickin," Shamus answered, kicking a nearby grave in response (then letting out a pained reaction as he leaned against the first wall.) "Sorry about that.. heh.. there was a lot going on then.. and I was morphed into a freakin catgirl! I've put it out of my mind as best I can."

"Eh, personally, I think he only skimmed the Finale!" Inu called out as she walked in, with a can of Lemon Mountain Stream.

"Inu!" the other two called at her for her breach of manners.

Feena glared at the two, but quickly regained her composure, standing by the second wall. "Alright.. now this is settled.."

"To be honest, I thought you made a lousy Catrina!" Catrina called out as she strolled in, leaning against the third wall. "I guess I'm 'often imitated, never duplicated,' though."

"Yeah, yeah," Shamus answered, shuddering at the memory of his time in Hey Daze.

"Thanks, by the way, for the soda, Cat!" Inu started slurping it as she rested her forearm on the unused wall, thinking to herself how hard it is to make use of lots of commas, but without also being redundant. "And now, I, Inu, comma chameleon extraordinaire, know what a bra is, too!"

"No problem, Inu," Cat answered. "So are we fighting the Bonerdargon as a group?"

"Right!" Shamus answered quickly and defensively. "That's why I'm here after all! As a part of the clan.. Officially, I mean!"

"Yeah, thanks, sparky, but I'm sure, well, pretty sure, they read the role-" Inu was cut off as all of a sudden the wall, without warning, collapsed on her! The others quickly rushed to help get the rubble off her, including Amras, who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere.

"Thanks," Inu whined. "I probably, like, deserved that, huh?"

The others looked baffled. "Deserved what, hun?" Catrina asked.

Inu decided to skip the subject. "We've gotta take out the other mini bosses before we can fight the big boss!"

"Ah, right!" Feena suddenly recalled. "The defilement spell must have been re-enacted, too. It'll keep us from getting to the main enemy until we deal with the others," she explained to Catrina.

"That makes sense, I guess," Catrina shrugged.

"No it doesn't!" Shamus quickly protested.

"Well, not really." Catrina chuckled.

"So, four mini bosses to deal with?" Amras shrugged.

"Three!" Shamus noted proudly. "I took care of the giant skleton already!"

"What do you 'mean' 'you' 'took care of it?!'" Inu protested, rubbing her head. "I took that thing down in the last r-" she noticed the wall behind her suddenly shudder and wisely changed her tone. "Er, the last really exciting .. adventure? Heh.."

She noticed with relief the wall stopped cracking and squeaking.

"Well, either way, one less demon for me to take apart before I get my rematch with old Boner.. Er..." Feena answered before realizing what she'd said. She shrugged it off. "You get the point. So which three corners are left to go then?"

Inu pointed to the southeast corner. "Well we meaning I already got that corner, earlier! That just leaves.."

Shamus interrupted, pointing to the northeast corner. "Fat dead things for 100, alex."

"And *REALLY* fat undead things this way!" Inu pointed at the southwest side of the giant crypt.

"Meaning Lichs would be innn..." Feena looked around, trying to remember, the pointed to the northwest corner. "That section."

"So who's got what?" Catrina asked, anxious to get this one over with. "I'm anxious to get this one..."

"Yeah, yeah," Shamus interrupted. "I think I'll take on the licks, I mean, how dangerous could licking someone be?!"

He walked off before the others could protest. "Urgh, I don't think she meant-" Inu started too late. "Idiot, wait for ME! Annoying, pretentious, obnoxious.. " Inu bounced after him, still stringing one insult to the next.

"That leaves us three," Feena noted. "Should we send someone to help him?"

Catrina considered it, but decided, "Naw, he's fine. Besides, I'm anxious to see how he performs on his own. Unless one of you two want to deal with him."

"No," Amras stated flatly.

"I'm good, thanks," Feena answered with a giggle.

"Besides, I shan't be leaving the side of my..." Amras decided against going further with that branch of thought in such a cursed, depressing place as this. "I'd prefer of Feena and I remained together, if possible." Still, he found himself glazing deeply into her eyes.

"Alright, so we should take the more dangerous set, if there's only two sub bosses remaining. Then whoever finishes up first can prepare to take on the bonerdagon."

Catrina shrugged. "I'll be fine, hun." She held out her hand, and suddenly, to the surprise of her two remaining comrades, a giant hammer suddenly appeared. Catrina flashed them a predator's smile. "I feel sorry for whoever gets the first taste of this baby."

Feena smiled inwardly, a bit. She could tell Catrina was anxious to get this over with- probably anxious to get make sure 'her' Dash came through unscratched. Which, if Feena knew anything of Sebastian Dash, was most nearly a sure thing. "Alright, let's get to it!" Feena took Amras's arm and walked off almost in a random direction, leaving the other direction to Catrina.

"Be careful, you two," Catrina called out, right before stalking towards her unfortunate pray. "Oh, and keep your mind on the job at hand, will ya?!"

Feena giggled, even though she knew Catrina was well into the distance already. As her and Amras walked on, she joked, "No promises."

 
Epilogue 1/3

 
Shamus looked around as Inu finally finished explaining. "So they'll do something more dangerous than lick me?"

Inu just facepalmed, then suddenly turned back to her normal self! Shamus shrugged, and charged head first into the defiled niche, tripping over a tombstone and landing face first at the feet of something which clearly wasn't a lihc.

Shamus yelped in pain as rubble of the tombstone landed painfully on his ankle. He winced as an annoyingly familiar voice cried out, "Hey! That was Satan's favorite tombstone! Get him!"

"That's starting to get old!" Inu protested.

"It doesn't even make sense anymore!" Shamus protested as the demons surrounded him.

 
Epilogue 2/3

 
Catrina giggled with delight as she tore into a grave robbing zombie, who's shovel was clearly no match for her +3 jerk boppage. It won't be long now until- oh Goddess, not again, she cursed mentally, as she noticed the entire defiled alcove took on a chill.

A very familiar chill. Catrina dodged at the last second as a snow ninja's kick nearly took her head off!

 
Epilogue 3/3

 
Amas and Feena held hands as they approached a familiar (if strange) looking bend in the defiled cranny..

"Huh- how'd THEY get here?" Amras wondered as the four creatures blocking the bend turned, ready for a fight.

Feena growled in frustration. A bunny growl.

"About time you goomba markalukes got here," a steady, Italian voice from the lead penguin called out to them. "The Penguin Mafia, we got a score to settle with you bums!"

Feena and Amras prepared themselves, knowing this wouldn't be an easy fight at all.