Well, here it is.

It's a rather big finale for such light roleplaying. But that's okay, I enjoy rereading it so that's a good sign.

Read up; there's another part after this, too!

 
Once again, fate and destiny conspired to overlap in explosive fashion, and so Seaside Town found itself in the midst of yet another epic story.

This chapter of our neverending tale of wonder found the recently rebuilt town under the more recent command of the penguin mafia. Naturally, the Council of Loathing took issue with this, but the penguins were able to get quite well fortified during the near end of the world disaster only weeks before.

This lead to two distinct responses to the penguin problem.

The council decided they had to work with the penguins to try to to appease them; the penguins agreed to leave town once the problem with the portals was taken care of.

Wildfall talked Alys into taking that approach to the problem. The two found themselves agreeing to take the job of breaking the knees of Gnollish teens who owed the penguins money. Alys, however, had other plans. Sassy Snake, who had also decided to work with the Council's plans, was making her way to Seaside Town.

On the other hand, Vikings from the Blood Clan, going against their clan leader's wishes, decided the best solution would be infiltrate Seaside Town and, if an opportunity came up, solve things with the penguins violently, which brings us to the start of our story.

Bob mumbled and muttered as the Vikings nudged him to keep up. He wasn't terribly happy to find out the Vikings preferred to move at a pace faster than a slow and steady walk, to start with. They were loud and obnoxious and clearly already half-drunk besides that. They were making an okay pace though so Bob hoped this would go smoothly.

Bob had brought along an assortment of familiars, unaware one of them- the turtle- actually held the spirit of the proud and once powerful Shelldor, who had until recently harnessed the very spirit of Boris himself. Now, Shelldor found himself as a mere turtle, with no memory of his demise. But maybe the trip to Seaside Town could shed some light on why... dare he hope for a solution to this?

Up ahead, he could hear the Vikings talking about the glory of victory they were sure to find and the pure joy of battle and questing and drinking and living. Oh, and they occasionally called each other's mothers fat and then laughed over it. The dark cloak of nightfall began creeping over the fading evening light as the group marched north towards Seaside Town.

Before long, they were in view of the Kingdom's capital city, guarded as it was by the various penguins, underground hobos, and of course, the four hired black knights. None of the Vikings were terribly happy to see any of this in the distance.

Ulf came to a dead stop. "Wait, how are we gonna take on just them with so few of us?"

"We're not, remember?" Another Viking came forward. "We're meeting with Olin and his so-called elite strike crew. Then we're gonna sneak in, or something."

"Vikings sneaking around," Rolf replied with a sneer. "I don't know if I care for that much, Valison."

"No Viking would," Valison admitted. "But we do what we must, and the victory over the penguins will be the stuff of song! We're nearly to the point of the meeting of destiny now. Let's get going."

"Urrrgh," Bob whined. "More walking. Great."

 
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Interlude (by Shelldor)

From the backpack, Shelldor listened to the vikings make plans. His head peeked out of the flap, his tactical senses still working despite his turtle form.

“Whatcha think Olin’s plan is for the penguins?” Ulf asked Valison.

“Sneak in, and when we think we can win, eliminate the penguin scum,” Valison said with a smile. "Like I said."

Rolf smiled. “I can't wait to bash some greasy penguin heads together.”

Ulf couldn't help but wonder, "Why are penguins' heads greasy anyway?"

"Shut it, Ulf. We're trying to be stealthy."

Shelldor surveyed the view of Seaside Town. The city looked very well guarded. Unless the vikings had very large numbers, an all out assault was out, and even then, it would be a struggle.

Shelldor reflected on his situation (mostly to drown out Bob’s whining). This seemed like just the kind of thing the adventurers he last remembered would get themselves into.

If he could figure out a way to question them, he might get answers.

 
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Bonus Scene #1

After passing by a couple mafia penguin in Seaside Town, Jarlsboris Wildfall and the wood elf Alys turned down another street and found another street devoid of people and animals. Even so, Wildfall was careful to keep his voice low and quiet. "Ya know, I just realized a big problem with your silly little plan, elfie."

"My name is Alys. And what would that be?" Alys asked.

"Well, elfie," Wildfall continued. "How are we supposed to warn the Goblin teenage punks about the penguin's plan if there's penguins around?"

"Are penguins telepathic?"

"No, but they can hear. And they got eyes. Beady bird eyes, but they still work."

"So how are they to know this isn't what we were asked to do in the first place? Come on, let's get going." Alys turned to leave.

"You are gonna get us killed!" Wildfall called out after her. "That's my job!"

Alys strolled to the wrong side of the tracks where penguins had said the deadbeat Knob Goblin teenagers hung out. "Hey," she called out to a group of them.

"Can we help you?" the first said, politely. "We are a group of Goblin deadbeats, so we are probably a little bit intimidating to a small thing such as yourself."

"What?" Alys laughed, surprised by the group's response. "I wanted to warn you that the penguins are looking for someone to break your kneecaps because you owe them money."

The four of them all turned to each other, confused. "Why would they do such a disrespectful thing?!"

Wildfall almost facepalmed. "Do we really gotta answer that?"

"Please do!" pleaded another Knob Goblin.

"Because penguins are stupid and don't realize that crippled people have a hard time repaying their debts." Alys answered. "Not that it was a good idea to borrow from them in the first place."

Then a group member's eyes lit up. "Do you think we should break their legs instead so we have more time to pay it back?"

"No!" Wildfall waved his arms in front of himself. "Pay them back the money you owe them and then go live productive lives or something! Geez.."

"Also, if you see any space elves, let me know. There might be a homemade pastry in it for you," Alys offered.

As she walked off, the Goblins traded confused looks. Wildfall looked similarly confused as he rushed to keep up with her.

 
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"I see mafia penguin," Sassy Snake called out to her three travelling companions, Icy (aka Carmel Ice), a rather large troll named Linger and Bristle, an old friend of Sassy's from her home dimension. "Do we actually know what we're doing now?"

"Nope!" Linger answered first. "Not a clue but penguins look funny."

Answered Icy, "I don't think I'd mention that to their face."

Bristle just chuckled. "I think we just talk to them and let them know we're here with the Council's quest."

"Sounds about right. Maybe I could lend a little help, darlin," a voice called out. Sassy quickly turned to see the roguish bard himself, Todd Blackpaws.

"Sure," Sassy asked. "Are you going to help the Council out as well?"

Todd nodded. "Seems like the best way to get the penguins out of town is to work with them, so yeah. I'm up for that. Walk you to the gate?"

"Sure!" Sassy said, glad to see him. "And I'll introduce you to my friends as we go."

Todd's tail flicked as he turned his eyes on Icy. "Perfect. Let's start with your cutie friend here."

 
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"Hail, good and noble Vikings!" Rolf called out as the two groups met up, forming a larger group. "T'is a good day to die and/ or loot!"

"Well met," responded the head of the other faction, the mighty Olin. "We were just debating how we'll be sneaking in."

Olin lead a mighty faction of his own, twice the size of the party that featured Rolf, Bob and the others. Olin's group featured some interesting additions which we shall get to in a moment.

Ulf stepped up, brave and bold was he. "Why do we sneak around like different types of spiders in the night, anyway? What use is stealth to a warrior?"

"Victory, my friend!" Olin answered with a friendly slap on the warrior's shoulder. "T'is good to see you, Ulf. I recall our battles in the past. But this one is against the penguins and in a fortified town. And we are, as much as it pains me to say this, honorbound not to engage in our traditional ways. We aren't here to murder the entire town for transgressions against nature of our people. In fact, we must protect them."

Ulf simply shook his head sadly.

"Besides," Olin said with a smile. "I doubt our allies would care for us slaughtering the innocents of this village."

"I can assure you they would not."

All eyes turned towards the voice and the statuesque elven owner of the voice although in this case, "statuesque" would be misleading, as nature and training clearly designed this elf for movement. Clad in her traditional red and black outfit, she quickly introduced herself and the powerful tiger furry towering over her. "I'm Jen of the Morlencir. This is Cattaras of the Whiteclaw family. We're as eager to see battle as you are, but we'll be doing this the smart way. As Olin said, we're not here to kill indiscriminately. We're just here for the penguins.

"But first we need to sneak in," Jen added. "Our best bet is going to be around the town's abandoned railroad tracks just south of the clan district. It's still going to be tricky. They're keeping the area sealed off from the clans and quite well guarded, but we can bypass that altogether by staying a bit to the south."

"Hold on, missy!" Ulf stepped forward bravely. "Why exactly are you talking like you'll be leading us? Shouldn't we.."

"One sec, meatbag," Cattaras interrupted. The next second, both Ulf and Cattaras were gone. Before the others could even register what happened, they were back, and Ulf's face was much more pale than it had been seconds earlier.

Ulf doubled over and muttered, "What.. saw.. Dessert Beach.. Mountains.. so.. fast.."

Another Viking asked, "Ulf, you fifl, what're you babbling about?!"

Still breathing a little heavy, Cattaras let out a low growl. "I took the fool for a quick trip around the Kingdom. Anyone else wanna question the lady's qualifications? I could take you for the same trip. Might leave you behind if you whine like he did, though. Or shall we move on?"

"Ahh, a man of action!" Olin declared. "Her plan is sound too."

"Thank you," Jen said to Cattaras, kissing him on the cheek and turning to the others. "And thank you, Olin. Of course, if any of you have a better plan, I'd love to hear it."

"I think we should just go with the plan, and stop standing around," another voice called out. She had hair as black as a raven and was clearly no Viking. Though the warrior spirit in her was obvious. "We could move now if we stop wasting time arguing with the elf here."

"Agreed!" Olin said, thrusting his waraxe high in the air. "To victory!"

"Urgh," Bob whined, "more walking."

Shelldor, meanwhile, found himself trying to piece together his memories of the town from childhood and his very brief visits to the town since returning from the past. He didn't quite know what he could find in this town that might help him, but there had to be something there. Meanwhile, Bob quickly staggered behind the group as it moved north, with Olin, Jen, and Rolf still discussing their exact strategy.

 
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Bonus Scene #2

Meanwhile, Alsy and Wildfall made their way to the market square, where they ran across a young Knob Goblin couple making out.

"Scuse'a me," Wildfall asked. "Is one of you known as Bill and Terri?"

The two stopped making out to look over at Alys. She smiled. "I'm Bill, he's Terri. Can we help you?"

"Um.. what?" Wildfall asked.

"Terri, the penguins seem to think you owe them meat for a watch you stole. They are looking for someone to break your kneecaps. Thought I'd warn you." Alys said.

Terri blinked. "Oh, thank you! Do you think I can take the job?! I could use the money to pay the penguins back for this watch I stole!"

Wildfall blinked. "That.. that is stupid."

"That is monumentally stupid. Unless it works." Alys said.

"Unless it works, huh?" Wildfall almost did a spit take despite not drinking anything.

"Do you think my boyfriend should try it?" Bill asked. She sounded hopeful.

"Nope!" Wildfall answered. "I mean, it's still stupid, for one. For two, I also don't think the penguins would make it that easy to pay them off. They'd probably accept it, but only if you did a dance or something stupid like that after. What do you think, Alys?"

Bill and her boyfriend Terri looked hopefully to Alys.

"Look, I've told you what's going on, and knowing is half the berry hunting. Let's go, Wildfall." Alys said.

"Peace out!" Wildfall said, making an actual "peace" sign.

"Thank you for helping my boyfriend!" Bill said, stroking her hair flirtatiously. "I guess we will get to the part where our gang ambushes you now, if it's okay."

"It's not okay," Alys said.

"And?" Wildfall asked Alys.

"And what?"

"Aren't you going to say 'None of this is okay,' too?"

"No?" Alys asked.

"Spoilsport," Wildfall said, pretending to frown. Just then, they found themselves surrounded by a bunch of Knob Goblin teens, all of whom were wearing different bright colors.

The only female there was Bill, who excitedly called out, "Here's the ambush you asked for!"

Wildfall facepalmed. "Do you think we can talk our way out of this?"

"Nah. We did our good deed by warning them. One good deed deserves another as they say, and their good deed is to give me something to beat the tar out of," Alys said. She lept into the hobgoblins, fists leading.

Bonus Scenes #1 and #2 by Dash (Wildfall) and Aleena (Alys)

 
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Jen, Cattaras and Olin took the lead as the party worked their way up around Seaside Town to the west side, being sure to stay out of sight of the penguins.

"Be careful," Cattaras warned. "The penguins are probably short sighted, and we're far enough away, but we should move carefully anyway. If they sense something's up, the party might get started earlier than we want."

Olin nodded. Jen turned to him, asking, "Do you have any other backup arriving?"

Olin grunted, and nodded. "A small group of archers are stationed, positioned a mile south of town, are ready to move in if we decide to attack openly. And the crew from the kol ship the PanSolo should be arriving and settling into friendly camps in Lil Canadia, should we need their help as well. It will be a good day to die, indeed."

"Wait," Ulf asked, joining the group for this specific bit. "Isn't that the lost ship cursed to sail the seas of Catalina until the ends of time?"

"No, that's the Pan Solo. This is the PanSolo. It was shot nineteen times, but it's fine."

Jen nodded as her suit picked up the otherwise invisible space between "Pan" and "Solo." She again noted what strange things her suit picked up on this world.

Before long, Jen announced to the others, "We're almost to the point where we'll make our move. Ready yourselves."

As the warriors prepared for the next move, Jen laid out the next part of the plan.

There it is, part 1! First part was obviously bringing everyone into the town, and that took longer than I expected.

I was originally going to post this as a single post, but since it was so long, I broke it up. Like always, it seemed like the final posting's post date kept getting pushed back day after day. But I eventually got it up, obviously.

It's late 2016 as I write this still. Not long after the mission was posted. I am hoping to keep up on the archived missions, so I can continue working on character histories but we'll see how that all plays out, I guess...