For those just tuning in, allow me to set the scene. For reasons explained in earlier missions, the Knob Goblins invaded Seaside Town during the end of the Mission Finale two missions ago. Kingdom of Loathing fought them during the last mission, but were ultimately repelled out of town as they took control of the Council Dome in the middle of Seaside Town. They then attempted to burn the rest of Seaside Town to the foundation!

Our heroes fight back, but are hampered when, on two separate occasions, the Jester King of Beasts manages to send two of our forces to other dimensions. Then, there were armies of Knob Goblins, including pyromancers, scientific experiments, and several members of the Elite 7.

For the mission Finale, I really pick things up as we kick the final fight with them into overdrive! Question is, who'll come out on top?! Here's part one!

Part I by Catrina- assistance from Dash

 
We join the finale as the Ninjas began their attack on our heroes. As they were attaking, one threw down a pellet which flashed and created a cloud of dense smoke. It surrounded Catrina. Catrina tried valiantly to fight but the ninjas are hidden from her sight by the smoke which also made getting their scents impossible. Though they'd kept the fact hidden from Sir Fumblies, Catrina could sense the cold, hard truth to the matter; these weren't ordinary ninjas.. but snow ninjas!

She moved, flashing back a short distance and trying desperately to clear her senses. She was not truly trained in blindfighting- having usually had the scent of her opponent to guide her. Now she had nothing but the sound her opponents made in moving- and the Ninjas were silent as the newly fallen snow!

She extended her Chi, feeling their attacks and trying to move to counter each. But they were many and she was burdened. Several of her opponents' attacks got through and Catrina began to despair. "Goddess, guide my hand!" she prayed before swinging blindly- only to feel the solid crunch of a connecting blow! As sure and soon as she took her next breath, she could feel two of them coming up to attack her from behind. Her powerful feline legs guided her to the side, as their attacks missed by a wide margin. The next attack was far too quick for her to avoid. She suddenly found herself flat on her feline ass, starring up at her estranged brother, Cattaras!

Catrina growled and rolled back, trying to kick out and claw her brother a good one but he grabbed her legs and swung her bodily into one of the Ninja's sending both down. Catrina gasped, as running into the Ninja was like hitting a wall made of ice! Despite that, the heat of the town, still smoldering hot from the earlier fires, began to melt the ninjas slowly but surely. They retreated.. for the moment.

She didn't have any time to recover, though as Cattaras grabbed her by the hair and pulled her back to her feet and into his face. "It's time to end this, dear sister.. Time for you to decide- come home or die!"

"Having hear'd of your blindness, my heart doth weigh heavy to my duties," came the familiar voice of Mtiger. It was enough to distract Cattaras. "We all owe our hearts to our duties, but when a fool's gambit become's a tiger's quest, and a man becomes subservient to his hatred, he ceases to be an animal and becomes little more than a beast to be put down."

Cattaras scanned the barely burning town and spotted the two of them. King Mtiger.. and Sebastian Dash.

"In other words, Cattaras, she is home. Give it up; your side's already lost." Dash said, his sword at the ready.

Cattaras glanced from one to the other than back at Catrina. "You tell me you have this around and you STILL go for the goofball?" Catrina's stunned silence was thankfully swept over by her brother turning back to MTiger. "I am no beast! I am a brother who sees what his sister is doing and cringes! She deserves far better than THAT!" He roared, pointing at Dash.

"It's her choice. Not yours. Besides, this isn't important. I want you out of my town. Now!" Dash answered.

Cattaras laughed. "You couldn't make me in an honorable fight, meat!" His eyes all this time were on MTiger.

Dash wasn't impressed. "You have no idea what honor means. Now, Joy!"

Before Cattaras could react, he found his legs growing suddenly numb, as ice cycles formed around them.

Cattaras' eyes were still fixed on MTiger. "Is this how you fight? By letting the weaker ones- the prey- do your dirty work?"

"Hey, it works for your owner, ugly!" Cattaras found himself face to face with Vixen, who deftly blocked his attempts to claw her with her staff, and rolled back into a fighting position, smiling at her verbal taunt at Cattaras.

Catrina could see her brother's fur bristle at that and decided to risk something. "If you hate it so, then stop following him! Maybe it's time to seek a new 'home'- like I have?"

Cattaras growled, still trying to get through Vixen's defenses. "Even if I wanted to do such a thing- Daisuke would.."

"Would what? Fight you?" Catrina gestured. "The only reason he has a hold on you is because you let him have one! Yes, he may be stronger- but you are faster- and much more intelligent!"

Becky suddenly yelled as she found herself surrounded by Knob Goblin guards. This didn't last long before Raw Hide rushed into one, smashing his back in with a seal clubbing club.

Cattaras saw the numbers quickly turning against him. He growled at Catrina. "A time is coming, dear sister, when you will not have your friends around to save you!"

Becky Joy grinned hiding behind Mtiger. "Yeah! I gotta lotta friends!"

Raw growled. "Don't call me no 'friend!'"

"You should know I'd never abandon her," Dash answered, ignoring the banter between the others. He walked up to Catrina, standing in front of her, ready to kill if he had to.

Cattaras growled but then heard the sounds of the retreat being called, little knowing or caring about the ominous reasons why. He narrowed his eyes at Dash. "There will soon be a reckoning of the strength of that oath, meat."

With that he flashed away. "No wait!" Catrina cried, followed by a heartfelt. "Damnit!" when she did not stop him.

"Looks like they're falling back out of town," Dash noted as the others dispersed into battle, leaving only the two of them. He turned her.. holding her close. "You still think he can be saved, don't you?"

Catrina was extremely emotional- even for her. Of course if you asked her she'd probably say the tears were from the smoke in her eyes but.... "He knows I'm right. But he's afraid he's wrong about me being right...oh goddess!"

She held him and mewled- and her body rubbed his in that special way it had.

"Let's let the others finish this up," Dash said, seething his broadsword Bad Beats and picking up the feline who weighed nearly as much as he did, running his hands over her very human body, enjoying the fur under his fingers. He carried her to the nearest hut, satisfied with a semblance of privacy for the moment.

Of course- the sounds that came FROM the hut broke all privacy- but we'll let them think otherwise, shall we? Besides, with the town in the condition it was, who would stick around long enough to listen?

The fires were dying down all around Fluffy Hamster, who sat Indian style several feet in front of the Council of Loathing dome. How's a hamster sit Indian style, you ask? Years of Hamster yoga. He also credits magicalblueberrymacmuffins, if you wondered. (Did ya? Did ya?)

He could sense the force field; it was quite powerful. Fluffy let out a yawn. These wars were tiring! He also wondered idly where the Knob Goblins got so.. many.. of themselves. He had theories, but nevermind those. There had been minor activity around the building. The Knob Goblin forced had spread out over the town, and wrecked havoc, attempting to burn the entire town to the foundation. In a few places, they'd succeeded; the people outside the walls were safe for the moment, but word was a massive group of Knob Goblins came from the south, marching like a black plague of death towards the town. The Kingdom of KOL forces had either fallen or retreated in the face of the large army with little success against them.

The forces around the Council Dome, now under the control of the Knob Goblins, had been cleared of activity moments ago by the combined efforts of the Bearsmasher siblings and the Winking Judge's bard, Todd Blackpaws. Fluffy summoned a giant anime magic pin and attempted to drive it into the force field's invisible parameters. It had no effect. Shoot. He sneezed fire on it, kicked it with his steel toed hamster boots, and even tried shouting it into submission. All this, and his giant anime fireball of doom, failed to do anything.

Wait.. what's anime?!

Fluffy let out a hamster's sigh. He then turned and bounced til he found Konall, and scurried up his leg, across the Viking's broad body, and onto his shoulder.

"Hi!" Fluffy squeaked.

"Any luck with the barrier?" Konall wondered, keeping a look out for more Knob Goblin trouble. He was almost- almost- tired of slaughtering them. Of course, he also knew the situation was becoming more and more dire.. He couldn't fight forever, and their greatest number could be outside the town this very second, as far as Konall knew.

"Nope! But I got an idea, so you gotta go get me some mages to help! Oh, and if you want, get yourself some backup! Kay, hurry back!" Fluffy grabbed his hair, and used it swing off his shoulder, somersaulting and landing on his feet. Konall grumbled, but respected the rank of Fluffy, not to mention his vast knowledge on magical matters. Konall hated magic, but this was a magic affair.

"Any specific kind of magic, oh fluffy one?" Konall sarcastically asked.

"Eh.. I can work with anything. I'm just gonna go nap in that hole til we're ready." Fluffy took off towards a deep looking hole, not being much bothered that it was still smoldering with flames and smoke. Hey, what's that to a magic golden hamster?!

 
Meanwhile, in the center of the Council's dome

 
The king of all Goblins paced back and forth around the impromptu throne, comprised of the three biggest chairs in the Council's dome, whatever gold items could be melted, and a heavy dose of magic. It wasn't comfy until he killed a domesticated Chocoboa to make the seat. This alternatively horrified, disgusted, and enraged the captive Council of Loathing members.

A few of the Council members were unaccounted for, so the Goblin King had been forced to spend precious resources hunting them down. The Knob Goblin forces had been depleted to the point only a few Elite Seven remained, along with those being considered in the case eventual replacements might be needed.

Along the wall, the remaining captured Council of Loathing members remained unconscious, thanks to the Knob Goblin's spell. Three had escaped; Boris, Dewey, and Council Friends member Warvin, the doofus'y one. Of course, the Nice Sorceress, the final member of the Council of Loathing, was too powerful to be captured in the first place.

The Goblin King made a face like he'd just drunk a sour lemon drink. (Which he actually had, to make sure his facial expression would be authentic.) He turned to Grillhamo and the Black Paladin.

"My king, where are the others?" Grillhamo asked, worried.

The Goblin King glared. "I sent those felines to return to me the remainder of my Council of Loathing prisoners, though I suspect they're no longer in the building. The others?" The Goblin King paused to sneer. "Obviously not here."

He snapped his attention towards the two.. what were their names? Mimi.. and.. Blane? No.. "Blake, isn't it? And .. Mimi."

The two looked up at the Goblin King without actually making eye contact. "Y-yes?"

The two were rather beat up and injured after their.. disagreement.. and their run in with Shamus XTreme, Bounty Hunter extraordinaire.

The Goblin King sneered. "For your sake, you'd best hope that none of the prisoners escape."

"My king!" Jester King called out in a panicked voice. "They're about to break the defending spell!"

"What?!" The Goblin King yelled. "I was assured this would be impossible!"

"Observe.." He pulled forth from his robes a seers' ball, small, black, and obsidian. It hummed with ethereal voyeuristic energies, shifted, smoldered and smoked. In the flames and smoke, an image came to be. The scene we saw was the very scene enacted moments ago with Fluffy on Konall's shoulder, although altered to seem so much more sinister and evil.

"Hear! With your ears!" The Jester King of Beasts ominously intoned. And with that magic declaration, we could hear the conversation between the two- although the Knob Goblin King was unaware it had been subtly .. altered.

"Any luck with the barrier?" We hear Konall ask.

"Yes of course!" Fluffy answered. "Just round me up some mages, and I can not only break it down, but probably kill everyone inside!"

"And the hostages?" Konall asked. (Or so it was made to seem.)

Fluffy's faked voice closed us out. "The Council? Eh, kill 'em and take over? Now get to work while I go nap!"

The Knob Goblin King looked at the tweaked images in outrage. "How dare they show ambition!"

"er.. quite." Jester King's eye twitched slightly. "The only solution is to remove the barrier and attack them outright with all our forces!"

The Goblin King glared at him- then hit him across the head. "Are you completely insane?! Actually, we know you are, but are you also an irresponsible, insane buffoon?! Although I'm starting to get the idea that's also obvious!"

Jester King winced. Ahh, to simply kill him outright. But that would ruin the carefully laid plans. After all, he wished to be the puppet behind an effective leader. Pushing his traitorous thoughts aside, the Jester King groveled. "F-forgive me, your Impressiveness. I simply thought you would wish to destroy them yourself."

"What?" The Goblin King's eyes lit up. "Of course, yes. Of course! I am brilliant.. Yes, you coward! Prepare to remove the barrier! But not until I gather my awesome army and.. What are you waiting for?! Begin gathering my army and we'll attack as soon as possible!"

"Gather your army and then what?" The Jester King feigned ignorance.

"And then we drop the barrier!" the Knob Goblin King broke out into maniac laughter.

"Then we what?!" The Jester King repeated, unable to believe it'd be so easy.

"DROP THE BARRIER, YOU IDIOT!" The Jester King repeated, becoming annoyed at this. His face turned red as he glared.

Acting afraid and confused, the Jester King turned, grasping the sun orb in his hands. "As you wish, my king."

With that, the King turned to the hostages, and slapped one at random- then suddenly realized the magical barrier around the castle had vanished. He turned towards the Jester King, confused.

"As you ordered, the barrier is broken," The Jester King announced. He then took note of the rage in the Goblin King's eyes. "Are you not satisfied with our impending vic-"

He was cut short as the Jester King slammed his fist across his mouth, sending him spiraling to the ground. "I didn't mean now, you impish fool!"

"Forgive me, my King, I can.." He began to fumble with the Sun orb.. only to have it kicked out of his hands. It let off a dark smoke. "No.. you've done enough," the Goblin King said in a dark voice. "Now, Grillhamo, lead The Black Paladin, our two.. novices as I engage 'Operation: Zombie Rising.' Foolish Jester of Beasts, escort them, so you'll be out of my sight."

"Operation.. zombie rising?" the Jester King asks, confused.

"Why yes," he answered. "I've ordered Nilpa, that dear powerful dragon to invoke a grand and powerful ritual to call forth and ordain an army of the undead to serve under and enforce my mighty rule! I've also sent out a retreat order to the Knob Goblins to ensure their safely as I enact this plan."

The Jester King of Beasts started to protest. "Surely you can't mean.."

"Yes!" the Goblin King roared, walking over to pull a great tome from a canvas bag nearby. "I shall use the Grimace of Dark Summon Rites to cast forth the Apocalypse of Fallen Allies! Bwahahahaha!" The Goblin King paused to catch his breath, then continued his demented laughter several seconds longer.

Jester King move to put a hand on him. Ever vigilant and protective, the Black Paladin and dark knight Grillhamo moved between him in the King. "Hands off the big man!" Grillhamo warned.

Jester King looked furious and confused. He could phrase past them but.. "Foolish king. You'll never be able to control..."

That's all he got out before the Black Paladin drove a gauntleted first across his jaw. Grillhamo spoke in the stead of the ever silent one. "Show some respect for your King, commoner!"

The Goblin King didn't even look over. "My power over the dragon is unquestioned, and the dragon's pure service is.." He paused, giggling like a schoolgirl. "Pretty darned cool huh?! Yeah.. there's no question this bad baby's going to come off perfectly. I'll finally get the respect I deserve. But nevermind that. You! Lead an attack force on the Kingdom of KOL! Now!"

The Black Paladin drew a sword. Grillhamo started to protest, but then looked towards the Jester King of Beasts with a snarl. "Your awesome King told you to lead so.. get leading!"

"Try to keep up!" The Jester King turned and phased through the wall, not turning as Grillhamo and Black Paladin broke through the wall to follow, with Blake Cutler and Mimi following, eager for a chance to prove Blake deserved in the Elite 7.

None of them suspected the dark thoughts of betrayal in the mind of the Jester King of Beasts. . . .

"There it is!" shouted Fluffy, a chef-in-a-box known in his former life as Xanadon the Defiler. No relation to Fluffy Hamster.

"There what is?" Kadlin asked, having finally returned to the proper section of the town, having been victorious in her efforts 'up north' in Little Canadia.

"The Bulky Beddy Bot!" Fluffy proclaimed excitedly. "I mean, Becky's Bulky Box Beddy!"

"Ah," Kadlin answered. "And I care.. because?"

"It'll corr.. er.." Fluffy the rethought his answer. "I mean, we've got to return it to its rightful owner. That rightful owner is Becky ... something."

"Becky Joy."

"Yes, her, one of my many, many friends. We must return it to her because.. " Xanadon paused. "It's the right thing to do."

"... what?" Kadlin paused.

"Because she's our friend and I.. ahh.. like her?" He continued. He sounded like if he had fingers, they'd be crossed.

"What're you trying to pull?" Kadlin asked, smart enough to be suspicious of the spirit of a great evil wanting to be 'nice' and 'do the right thing' for 'their friends.' She didn't even care for Becky that much, although she assured herself it wasn't jealousy of Becky's power. Oh Hel no!

"Simply being a good.. oh just get it!" Fluffy ordered.

"Look, if it'll shut you up, alright." She walked over and picked up the Buddy Box. She began walking to find some Knob Goblins to kill. She turned, walking off, when she heard it.

IT.

The voice.

Hello, powerful one.

Kadlin paused and turned around, confused by the voice. No one around... "Ahh.. Fluffy, that wasn't you?"

There was an evil glee in Fluffy's.. er.. in Xanadon's voice. "No it was.. er.. I have no idea who it is! Let me be, woman!" His voice shifted to annoyance.

Kadlin just shrugged. "Well, knock it off."

She walked on in peace, figuring to throw the box into the closest sewer at the first badly written excuse.

Not again.

Kadlin stopped dead in her tracks. "W-what? 'Not again,' what? Who is this?"

Nevermind that. They have a message for you.

Kadlin pulled a fire wand out, ready for trouble. She'd found it after a fight on her way back from Lil Canadia. "Who has a message for me?"

The Knob Goblins.

"I could care less what they have to say. Now show yourself." She was ready for a fight. Then again, a Bearsmasher should always be ready for a fight.

No. The new Knob Goblins.

"New...?" Kadlin was almost as confused about that as she was by the source of the mysterious voice.

Nevermind that. What's important is, you can have unlimited power with them. Learn the true ways of magic. Prove your worth as a Viking warrior! Become a legend.. no.. become a Goddess of War! They also offer degrees in masterminding evil, raising the undead, and air condition repair.

"Ah, well, I guess there's only one answer to that."

Yes, accept!

"Yes, accept!" Fluffy repeated anxiously.

"No, like this." With that, she took the Bulky Buddy Box and kicked it as hard as she could. It soared about ten feet, bounced off a burning building and landed on Becky Joy's head. Becky skipped off with the box still on her head, drawing a brief confused stare from Kadlin.

Fluffy hid his surprise at the refusal to evil poorly. "Er.. we've returned the box as I intended. Well done. Also, I heard nothing the box said and refuse to believe it talked."

"Whatever." She walked a few more buildings, making her way back towards the Council's dome for another try at the magic protections keeping the Knob Goblins safe from justice, when she bumped into her older brother Konall. They quickly exchanged greetings and traded highlights on their war stories, fully expecting to tell each other more in depth tales later over a magnificent victory campfire. Konall then explained the situation.

"So gather a bunch of mages. That should be easy." Kadlin shrugged. "How many? Fifty? A hundred?"

"Please." Konall paused. "How about whatever we can get in the next five minutes? I don't want to miss too much of the killing.. or have to share it with too many people."

"True." Kadlin nodded. "And most of them are probably busy with the rest of the war, anyway. Alright, see you in five."

The two parted ways, fully intending to spend as many of the five minutes battling as they could, anyway.

"Any luck?" Kadlin asked when they bumped into each other about ten minutes later.

Konall hoisted a Knob Goblin corpse above his head and flung it to the ground in a display of above average power. "What? Oh.. no, I was too busy smashing Goblin bones. You?"

"Too busy frying their skins from their bodies." Kadlin shrugged.

"Well, we did about as much as could be expected from us," Konall responded.

"How? By spending five minutes not doing what we were supposed to?"

"Actually, yes. After all, if you think about it- OOF!" Konall jumped forward slightly as if being bumped into someone.

"If you think about it, oof?" Kadlin was confused. "I don't get it."

"Something just bumped into me!" Konall looked around, confused. Both Bearsmashers jumped back as a familiar looking long haired, robed half-orc suddenly popped into existence between the two.

"And that about does this section of invisible ninjas," Fumblies posted. "Oh, what's up, guys?"

"Sir Fumblies," Konall greeted him with a traditional Viking nod, which is somehow cooler and more badass than a normal nod. Somehow. "Meet and resist ogling my fair sister, Kadlin. We're off to break down a magical barrier. You in?"

"I'd be happy to lead you to victory!" Sir Fumblies Falanges proudly declared, causing the Vikings to wince at the arrogance.

"Just stay out of the way while I'm smashing stuff," Konall warned, off put by his presumption of leadership.

Fumblies brushed a bit of rust off his chainmail armor. "I'll bring my assistants!"

"Assistants?" Kadlin asked, confused.

"Yes, well.. my new friends, anyway. One moment." He darted down the block a few seconds.

"Should we just leave him?" Konall asked. It was more of a very strong suggestion than a question.

Kadlin strained her eyes, and noticed him round the corner. "Too late. Here's the happy couple, Blackpaws and Lapine."

Lapine, Fumblies and Todd Blackpaws strolled onto the scene at a casual pace.

"Alright, you three will do as backup nicely," Kadlin confidently suggested. "Just follow me lead and you'll do great!"

She stalked off towards the Council's dome. She fully expected she could bring it down on her own, given enough time, but with Lapine and Fluffy providing magical backup, which Todd would be boosting, she'd look even better once she brought the shield down. Of course, her brother and Fumblies might always end up being useful, too.

"You coming, princess?" Konall taunted, snapping her out of her dreams of her amazing magic abilities and soon to be newfound glory. She suddenly realized the others had already passed her and hurried to keep up.

"Hey, wait for your leader!" She whined, rushing to keep up.

"I thought I was the leader!" Fumblies said with a smile. "I mean.. I am at the front of the line."

"Oh who cares who leads?!" Lapine complained. "Let's just tear this thing down!"

"Oh for Sneaky Pete's sake!" Konall complained, yelling at them all to stop the annoying bickering.

Todd just smiled, strumming his guitar, warming up his magiks. "Well, at least it won't be boring..."

 
As soon as they arrived on the scene, Todd played "Traditional Viking Smash," a traditional Viking song, to build up both Sir Fumblies and Konall into an unstoppable rage for a short period of time. Spaz played his own support in the form of "Jackasses' Symphony of Destruction" for the offensive melee duo. The two warriors began physically attacking the side of the building, hoping to both break into it and damage the spell keeping the KOKOL forces out of the building. He then joined the mages on the other side, where Kadlin and Lapine came up with a quick plan of their own.

"Ahh, maestro Blackpaws. I'd like a few stanza of 'Stevedave's Shanty of Superiority,' please." Kadlin requested in a voice that was meant to be authoritative, with a hint of humor, but ended up just sounding pompous.

"A very fine selection, M'Lady," the foxlike Todd said in a playful imitation of a French waiter's voice. He then dug into the song, upp'ing the 'righteous indignation' in both all five KOKOL'ers in range, thus somehow making them stronger, smarter and more magical. One of the legendary songs of the Kingdom!

Kadlin laid in with even, methodical bursts of bursts of magic at the shield, moving from one element to another. She switched between conjuring noxious clouds of gas, debilitating bursts of fire, terrorsauces, mini blizzards, and even naughty bursts of innuendo, hoping to crack the shield by honing into any weaknesses.

Fluffy's attack wasn't quite as evenly distributed along the different weak points as Kadlin's. It was really two broad attacks. Repeated lightning attacks on the upper half of the force field, and a widespread burst of fire missiles, covering a wide area of the building, aimed to destroy the force field and if needed, enough of the building to allow them to attack.

Whereas Kadlin's magic offense was varied and well thought out, Lapine took a different approach, using her star wand to throw out more powerful attacks in bursts. Although she wasn't throwing out the spells as consistently as Kadlin, the spells she did sling hit with more force and impact.

Meanwhile, Konall laid in with the even rampage of a veteran Viking berserker. Though Fumblies lacked his skill, and occasionally would, well, fumble, he brought to the table something of his own - a powerful element of fire to his attacks.

The two sided attack had only gone on a few minutes when the force field was dropped.

"We did it!" Kadlin boasted, turning to pose victoriously for the others. "I told you I could lead us to victory!"

Todd resisted the urge to break into a celebratory dance. Barely.

"Uh, actually," Fluffy observed. "I think they just dropped it."

"Don't be silly," Kadlin chastised. "Why would they drop it?" She stored up a little magic, preparing herself for the fights ahead.

"My guess?" Lapine shrugged. She'd walked to where Konall stood. "They only dropped the walls to attack and kick our tails..."

"Why'd you think that?" Kadlin wondered, still perfectly sure her offensive magic, along with the help of the others, had allowed her to single handedly (with help) bring down the magic protecting the Knob Goblins..

Konall shrugged. "At a guess? I'd say she saw that group of Knob Goblins standing behind the section of wall we just blew off over here."

The others rushed over to gather around. The Jester King of Beasts had floated up, but stopped upon seeing the Kingdom of Loathing forces, allowing several Knob Goblins to catch up. The Black Paladin and Grillhamo, atop their respective horse and black panther, strode into sight behind, leading a smaller group of unusually dangerous looking backup for a Knob Goblin army.

"Destroy them!" The Jester King of Beasts commanded, rushing forward but staying intangible. Though hardly well organized, they certainly held the edge over their enemy's response in terms of organization.

"Attack!" Kadlin called out. "Take them head on!"

"Fall back!" Fumblies cried out at the same time. "Lure them out of the building!"

Konall, of course, needed no prompting to rush forward into battle, still aching for glorious battle. Todd, meanwhile, seemed more inclined to play it smart and fall back, while Lapine froze, unsure of which of the two commands to listen to. Konall rushed into battle, quickly killing the first Knob Goblin in his way and injuring the next two before they could even react to his presence. He swiped a longsword from the dying Knob Goblin, and brought it down on another Knob. This one, however, was an Elite guard. He brought his shield up just in time. Even so, the impact of Konall swinging the longsword dug deep into the shield, stunning the enemy and forcing him to drop his shield. Without pause, Konall raised his haxxor up and brought it down fatally on the Elite Guard.

Or, rather he would have, except Grillhamo's Black Panther launched itself on Konall as he tried to. Thanks to the element of surprise and hellacious momentum, the Panther drove Konall into the nearby wall of the Council building, cracking the plaster and stealing Konall's breath. The panther took a lazy swipe at Konall with its mighty paws, catching the seal clubber's forearm as he tried to block. The panther then turned to assist its owner, Grillhamo.

Todd started playing an anthem to rally his side when the clicking of crossbows. He looked up to see crossbows flying through the air in groups of three and four, and dove for cover. Apparently, the Knob Goblins had brought their own snipers. Looking up in the general area, Lapine attacked with elemental blasts, wanting to draw them into a firefight she'd hopefully win.

Sir Fumblies squared off with Black Paladin, dropped his sword, and recovered it just in time to parry an attack from the black armored Paladin. He avoided Paladin's next attack, ending up behind Paladin. Fumblies slammed his boot into Paladin's back, sending him stumbling forward, but before he could follow up the attack, the Jester King of Beasts threw his bony, agile body into Fumblies from the side, sending him sprawling. Before he could recover, the Jester King summoned a rat to jump at his face. Fumblies freaked out and fell back, pulling at the rat and screaming, "Owwww, it's biting my face!"

Sighing, with a sense of smug superiority, Kadlin mumbled to herself, "I guess I'm going to have to finish this one on my own." With a proud Viking roar, she jumped the Jester King from behind, intent on catching him by surprise. She shouldn't have roared; all it did was tip him off. He phased out of synch with the physical reality just long enough for her to soar through his suddenly insubstantial body. Turning, she fired a lightning quick bolt of lightning. Reacting with eerie speed, the Jester King twisted it enough so it barely avoided his body, then twisted it midair. It gazed Lapine and Fumblies before zero'ing in dead on Kadlin. Her eyes went wide with panic as she rolled to the side, avoiding the brunt of the lightning. The force was still enough to send her body tumbling to the side.

"Finish them while I take care of any would be help!" The Jester King of Beasts screamed at his 'allies.' It was a lie, of course. He only had one thing in mind as he phased through the closest wall, out of his allies' sight. Covertly avoiding attracting attention, he phased back into the Council building, phasing through walls and making his way to where the sun orb had been discarded. Thankfully, it was still there, and most of what he needed was nearby. Jester King phased through another wall to retrieve a bag he'd left earlier, just in time. As he fumbled through the bag, his attention was torn by a loud noise. It seemed to be a combination of a hum and a high pitched whistle, the likes of which was never meant for ordinary man nor common beast to ever hear.

Jester King pushed open the closest window, and turned his attention to the skies overhead as the clouds and blue sky took the hues of unnatural combination of grays, purples and reds. Unholy and barely human moans echoed the entire town coming from seemingly everywhere at once, even though it seemed to come from nowhere in particular. Jester King looked up to see the dragon in the thongs of the spell.

The undead were coming. Jester King smiled, producing two exceedingly rare talisman from his bag. It had taken Cattaras and Daisuke months and months of hunting the Spooky Forest and The Misspelled Cemetary in their spare time, and they'd found it only mere days ago, thanks to the assistance of their newest ally, a gypsy who'd worked under the Knob Goblins and claimed a falling out with the King had resulted in her services dismissed. She claimed she'd wanted nothing more than revenge and to see the King suffer and fall. Though Jester King doubted her loyalty, she was the key to coming up with this plan...

The gypsy had also given the Jester King of Beasts a pair of equally rare items. The King's own incredibly dense meat gem, and the very hypnodisk used in the bonding of Jester King and the source of his powers... Of course, the spell would drain all four items of their usefulness, but the Jester King gladly would pay that price.

There were more items to be used, but Cattaras and Daisuke would have to bring them to the Jester King. For now, he closed his eyes, focusing the incredible magic of the ultra rares through the Sun Orb, and chanted demonically.

He only had one image in his mind - the target of his spell.

Catrina Whiteclaw.

 
Part II by Dash