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Mission #4 Rollover: Battle Royale
Mission:  Return to Mirrorworld
subtitle: Fight for Love, Revenge, Pie

Posted by Konall
Original Rollover

This Rollover is a break from the norm in a few ways, from Cameron posting it to the use of multiple writers. It also sets the stage for several personal conflicts which play out during the mission.

And of course it sets a larger mission as well. I believe Aleena, Cameron and Mitch helped me come up with an impressive story. As you'll see, it succeeds in launching several stories, many of which rely heavily on the unique setting and mission conditions.


 
Part I by Dash and Cattaras; Part II by Aleena, Dash and Konall

 
Another world.

One which felt so familiar to some of the people who would soon be waking up here. In most ways, it was nothing like the Mysterious Island of Mystery. A few strangers awoke, scattered throughout the island. None of them had slept comfortably. One of them had slept so uncomfortably that we can't discuss it in polite society.

His unconscious body appeared in a small patch of grass earlier, locked in nightmarish images. A recently broken arm had mysteriously been healed, although it still ached noticeably.

Fumblies awoke with a bitter, acidic taste in his mouth and the image of Kwadlin burned into his eyelids.

Not literally.

He was hungry. Damned hungry. And it felt like his blood had been replaced by tiny axes. Fumblies finally sat up, shaking his head and trying to clear his vision. He noticed a blur before him.

"Bout time you got up, lazy meatbag." Came a growl from over at his left and, turning to look he saw the big tiger Cattaras, leaning against a rather large animal bone and looking sour.

"Oh, perfect, a giant bone for a giant bone head," Fumblies said, shaking his head again. "And what exactly did you bring us here for? You know what? Nevermind that.. just get us back to the Kingdom proper so you and your sister can let me do my job properly."

Cattaras was in his face. "If I had brought you here it would either be to kill you or save you. If I had wanted to kill you I'd have left you for dead back there. If I had wanted to SAVE you I would expect more gratitude!" He then leaned back again, that sour look replacing the rage. "But... I didn't do this."

Fumblies glared, and suddenly got an insight. "This must be your sister's plan to let us iron out our differences. Either that or her idiot so-called 'mate.' So either you get out of my face and obey orders like a good kitten, or we settle things once and for all."

Fumblies could hear his own voice but he wasn't really sure what was compelling the words. He wasn't entirely sure if he was in control of himself or not.

Cattaras couldn't help it- he laughed. Loudly. For a good while before calming down. "I saw her- before we got it she was rushing to save me. As for Daisuke... well he has not grasp of magic, among other things." His grin turned into a smirk. "Sometimes I wonder why I wanted her to choose him. I mean he is our kind and all but... why do the good girls always end up with the biggest dicks?"

Fumblies did a double take. "Believe me, I know from personal experience she doesn't have a.."

A growl cut him off. "Meant Daisuke, meatbag. I'm just as well aware of my sister's anatomy, thank you very much."

Fumblies sighed. "Whatever.. If you want a fight, I'll.. wait a minute, something's going on."

Fumblies pointed towards several flickering lights in the distance. As they got closer, drawn almost by force to the odd happenings, they started to see a scene from somewhere else playing on the long abandoned island.

Cattras growled, clearly able to see Aleena cuddling up next to an unconscious Sebastian Dash in a quiet, obviously chilly desert cave.

"Oh great, this place gets porn." He growled, not at all amused.

They found themselves unable to turn away from the image which started to play out.

-------------------------------------------

Dozens of miles away, that very scene was playing itself out. Two bodies stirred, one unconscious and warm, despite the cold, moved by emotions they didn't really understand. Passions, though, would be a better way to put it. An aching need mixed with an unexplained anger. Aleena had lain with Dash since coming to this place, snuggled close to him to keep warm. She felt warm herself, her body stirred with heat and need, a lust for her human lover. Dash awoke to the feel of her hands on his bare back, his shirt pushed to the side. He groggily tried to push away before suddenly realizing who it was.

Seeing her so close, able to smell her, Dash's eyes were nevertheless nearly crossed from exhaustion. He leaned forward, watching Aleena, who smiled demurely. It was the invitation he needed to quickly bridge the gap between their lips. They kissed passionately, Aleena gasping out her small moans of desire as her fingers dipped into Dash's pants. However, the more passionate they got, the more strain it took on their bodies.

"Unh, the more I want you, the weaker I get..." Aleena moaned. "What is this place, Dash?"

Dash and Aleena climbed to their feet and he slid an arm around her. "Yeah.. maybe we better hold this until later. They might have teleported us.. where ever we are. Teleportation might account for the exhaustion." Dash looked around. They'd been left in a cave, near the entry. Further into the cave were sparse signs of grass-like moss growing. "Too much desert to be Ireaca. From what little I know of the deadlands, the air's too.. breathable. I.." Dash paused, falling to one knee, his eyes shut in agony.

Aleena stumbled with him, holding him close to her body. She felt his pain, too.

"It's like something poking at my brain," Dash admitted after a long pause. "Like I need to crush something.. break.. someone."

"I feel it too," Aleena whispered, giving Dash a concerned look. "But... it's not coming from you. You must resist it." Her fingers explored Dash's body, looking to trigger an endorphin rush to counter the effects of... whatever it was. That, and she really loved teasing him, though this was clearly not the place or time. Dash yanked himself away, however.

"Dash, don't go. I need you," Aleena could not help herself. Her man was strong and handsome. Worthy of an elven queen. He was rugged and brave, a fit soldier, a hero. And she wanted him so badly. She pulled herself close to him, though her motions, her posing, began to take on a submissive tone. To Dash, however, it felt wrong, off, like an enemy were trying to kiss him, or his sister (if he had one).

His sharp rogue's ears detected the faint sound of a teleportation spell, the light footsteps of two people who strode confidently, and a rather loud argument between them. Aleena's suit detected it too, but she was too wrapped up in an unrelenting passion to care or even consciously notice.

"See, I told you I had a plan to get us out of there," came the voice of Viking powerhouse Konall Bearsmasher.

"Get rescued randomly by some unknown force is not a PLAN! It's an exercise in stupidity! It was sheer dumb LUCK that you got us out of there." And that had to be the voice of Kadlin. "What were you going to do if someone hadn't zapped us out of there? Break off your restraints through sheer manliness and pummel all the penguins with your bare hands?"

"More or less, yeah. I'd make sure we both got out safely."

"SAFELY! You were going to kidnap me yourself!"

"Not kidnap. We're family. It's more like a grounding."

"This is just like that time you locked me in the cellar to keep me away from Dirk."

"We called him Dirk the Jerk for a reason. He only wanted one thing from you, and I didn't want you dating a guy like him."

"Yeah, he was as bad as you."

"Exactly."

By now, the two had gotten close enough to see Aleena push Dash off his feet, quickly straddling him. Dash tried to push her off, but Aleena's fingers running along his thigh distracted him for obvious reasons. She grabbed his wrists, pinning them to his sides while using her knees to hold him.

The hatchet that almost hit his face also distracted him, again for obvious reasons.

"Konall," Dash said, surprisingly non plussed. "Surprised to see you here, Viking."

Konall growled. "You looked like you needed a shave."

"Kind of busy," Dash said, dismissively, feeling his own aggression rising but not quite knowing why. I mean, didn't he want Aleena peeled off of him?

But not by this jerk.

"If you start throwing things at me, I'm going to have to treat you like the ignorant caveman you are," Dash said. "Wait.. I didn't say.."

"If you keep insulting me, I'm going to have to treat you like the kittenskin you are." Konall yanked Dash out from underneath Aleena and immediately had to cover his eyes thanks to a well timed bit of flash paper to the eyes!

Konall groped around for Dash for a few seconds, but only ended up trying to strangle a stalagtite. "Stupid rock."

"Sword, to my hand!" Dash proclaimed loudly, holding his hand out. Nothing happened. "Grr.. woulda worked with the mirror sword, I bet."

Konall took out his broadsword and tossed it underhand toward Dash. "Can't make this too easy of a fight. No fun that way." And it wouldn't be likely to impress Aleena. The Viking pulled out his own haxxor and readied it.

Dash sneered. "I hope your sister's got enough mana to heal the fat I'm going to slice off of you, Viking!"

Dash said the word "Viking" as if it were an insult.

Kadlin chimed in. "Actually, I don't do the healing thing anymore."

Konall wanted to retort, but couldn't think of anything clever to say, and decided to try to turn Dash into a grease stain with one swing of the hammer end of his weapon. As if he'd seen it coming- and he did, he was watching- Dash avoided it, nimbly ducking under the arc of the swing and slamming his fists into Konall's meaty body. Dash's muscles tensed. He felt far stronger than usual.

Aleena moved to get between the two. But Kadlin tripped her with the glaive while she was distracted and said, "Hold up there, Slutpants."

Aleena flipped over backwards, feet over head, and still managed to land on all fours. She shook her head as her rational self re-asserted dominance, "Thanks. I felt as though I were in a fog."

Kadlin couldn't answer; a sudden, bright burst of light shoved them apart. Inside of the light stood an unfamiliar figure, laughing manically. The four didn't recognize the figure of Kwadlin.

"Who are you," shouted Konall, "and can I get back to splatting this punk's brains across the cave?"

"In due time," the figure said. "But let me shift to a form some of you will find more familiar." And with that, he shifted, his appearance alternating almost in full.

"Philler!" Dash spit out.

"You got the drop on me once. But you shall not fool me again. Now to see if it's really you!" Aleena leaped forward, an arm outstretched and a fist cocked, terrible serrated claws lancing forth from her knuckles. However, the closer she got to him, the weaker and more dizzy she felt. Her momentum carried her into Philler's personal shield. She bounced off of it, falling to her knees before she could connect. Enraged, Dash and Konall leaped forward with their own attacks in mind only to suffer the same fate.

"SILENCE, FOOLS! Today, you're a part of my game, which means you'll battle each other when I see fit. Should you refuse to fight, the drugs coursing in your bodies, and even in the bodies of the Vikings, will kill you. However, should you engage in fair and honorable combat, then you'll be healed. Should you suffer what would be a mortal wound, you'll be removed from the game," yelled Philler in a booming voice.

"I am going to kill you," Aleena said. "You have seen Dash's mind, and you have glimpsed mine. You know there is nothing that will stop me."

"This may be so, but only if you win the contest," Kwadlin said. "The winner will gain the rights to have any wish they want fulfilled. The winner will also gain the right to name the stipulation of the next tournament, should there ever be one. The winner shall also earn the right to decide who returns to their own world, and who stays."

Aleena climbed back to her feet and staggered back towards Kwadlin. She knew what she was up against, and vowed to try to push through the effects. She got shoved back for her efforts.

"Where are we, then?" Kadlin, obviously the smart one of the four, demanded to know. "Another dimension? Nonsense."

"Your males have been here before," Philler said, amazed they'd not figured it out.

Konall looked confused but Dash got it. "Lady Whiteclaw's world!" Dash turned to Aleena. "The one we dreamed about, but.. probably different, since I'd only seen a small part of it until now."

"Ah," she could only comment.

"Now, you'll be allowed to battle when you find one another," Philler boasted, caring even less about Dash's comments than Aleena did. "For now, know two things. The drugs pumping through your body are the only thing giving you the strength to survive here.. and the rest of the participants, some of whom may be familiar to you and some of whom aren't, are seeing this interaction. If you can find the rare energy roses scattered throughout this kingdom, so much like your own and yet so unlike your own, then you may use it, at only the smallest price to your soul. Now go forth. Survive my tournament, and in doing so, bring chaos to the lands!"

Philler began to laugh. His voice grew so loud it nearly deafened the four. And in a flash of light, each was teleported to a separate location in the freezing desert.

All around this so called "Flip world", like ours in many ways and unlike ours in many more, similar scenes were playing out as Philler's game of survival was only beginning.. Yet, would our Adventurers and heroes play along or would they be making up a new game with their own rules?

 


So the idea of the premise has Kwadlin/ Philler trying to force our heroes to battle each other. We'll see and comment over the extensive course of the mission how that plays out. Although surpassed by the Holiday mission, this mission sets the Season two bar for roleplays for a single mission pretty high. We'll start with Dash, Aleena and Konall before moving onto an Ireaca trio.

 
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Kingdom of Loathing (KOL) is a (mostly) original online game that apparently has something to do with Asymmetric Publications, LLC, and something called a Jick, who probably copyrighted it. This is the archive for an interactive writing game based on KOL, and a specific clan within- the Kingdom of KOL. Specific characters belong to their specific owners, specifically, unless specifically stated otherwise. This game was developed by Joshua A. Dexter, with rules based in part on Mercenary and Equinox. Live Roleplay rules developed and balanced by Cameron Millar. This is a non profit game done for entertainment purposes only. If a rash develops on your imagination, desist use immediately and consult a physician, psychologist, or 1-900 psychic for further assistance. KOL forums, store, entry at Answers, KOL's entry at Archive.org, and it's entry at Wikipedia, and KOL's own wiki. - JAD
In other words, I don't own KOL, or KOKOL, and KOL doesn't own KOL. Get it? Good!
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